Blah Blah Blah...

Check the vlog!

2010-10-28T17:20:00.000-07:00

The information for the voting process is a little old--voting ends tonight and the winners will be announced tomorrow (Oct. 29th). Wish me luck!

Well Well Well...

2010-10-21T12:59:00.000-07:00

Look who finally decided to update again.

Quite a few of my friends in my musical theatre program are blogging, and I still vlog (though rather infrequently), and I figure I need something to share my thoughts in or at least document what I did whenever I can remember to document it.

I now officially live 3 and a half hours outside of Toronto in a little town called Brockville. The people are nice, it rains a lot and you can get anywhere in Brockville for under 10$ worth of cab fare (which is amazing when transit gets as expensive as it does in Toronto). I did my best to shut myself off for the summer so I could function and finish everything I could for high school and get to where I am now. I honestly could not be happier.

So much blood, sweat and tears go into the program, and it's amazing. I've been ASM'ing (assistant stage managing) with the 3rd year show (The First 5 Years... Astonishing!) and it makes me so incredibly excited to do new faces (The 1st year show). The costumes alone make me want to scream, but everything else like the orchestra, lights and the complete professionalism of everyone in the company (performers and production crew) just makes everything so worth working towards!

Today was a complete onslaught of mid-terms, and I can HAPPILY sleep in tomorrow! Ah, the excitement!

I have the dress rehearsal for the 3rd year show later tonight and the rest of the 1st and 2nd years get to watch the show. I'm excited to see their reaction to it! I'll be sure to update with videos and pictures from backstage!

Aw Crap.

2010-06-20T13:54:00.001-07:00

I didn't forget to blog on saturday, I simply just couldn't do it. I was exhausted. I didn't finish my bronze cross this weekend because I got sick, so now I have to do the entire course again another weekend. I still feel bad about not finishing it, but I think I get the fact that it's not my fault (for once). So now I'm at home, lounging in the kitchen with my grandparent's cat meowing at me to give him treats. That's really all he asks of me. To feed him when it's convenient for him. Well, at least he's honest about what he needs. He doesn't have a need to lie, he's a cat.

I'll probably blog again later today just to try and make up for not blogging yesterday, but for now I'm going to listen to my stupid-pop-playlist and let my inner douche bag complex have it's time out in the sun. The playlist happens to include Ke$ha, Katy Perry, and LMFAO.

So I'll throw a bone out there if anyone wants to answer:

What is the song that makes you feel like a bad-assed frat-boy whenever you listen to it?

Sunken battleship.

2010-06-18T20:18:00.000-07:00

I felt like I let a lot of people down today. As a performer and general artist, I've been warned not to attach myself too personally to projects, but that's what's really required for me to produce some of my best work. I never realized just how closely I attached myself to projects and shows until recently.

A while back I was cast in a production of Into the Woods, and because of things including school, choirs and schoolwork, I had been cut from the production because I had missed one rehearsal. I missed the rehearsal because I couldn't drive myself from Scarborough to Brampton, I was falling asleep at the wheel. Since then, the director that I deeply respected and relied on for strength for some time, has completely disconnected herself from me, including ignoring e-mails and any form of communication. When she had told me I was cut, she didn't bother to tell me herself, but instead called my grandmother (whom I live with), and told her to tell me. I've been told since then it was incredibly unprofessional of her to do that, and that I had been expecting too much of myself to do a production during school.

Since then, I've had a hard time really getting myself back on my feet in terms of performing, and I feel like I can't get back to the level I was once at. I'm unsure if I'm really ready for a performing arts college and I walked out of a recital today simply because I was so terrified I'd let myself down again.

I don't know what the hell to do, I want to curl up into a ball and cry about it and I don't want to see my vocal coach (who organized the recital) because I feel like I've let her down as well.

Someone tell me where to go from here, please?

Deadline

2010-06-17T20:27:00.000-07:00

I promised that I'd write everyday, and I still have at LEAST 30 minutes before I've missed today. So I'm all good.

I'm happy to say that today wasn't as depressing as yesterday. I was able to sleep and just recover for most of today, so I'm thankful my exams are over and I can actually do that.

I can't say much else happened today, it hasn't been terribly exciting, though I am happy to be planning my birthday party with my friends. :) When you have friends, everything else becomes a little easier to survive, so thanks guys, whether you read this or not, I love you guys.

Cheers to Starting Over.

2010-06-16T12:06:00.000-07:00

I started this blog back in 2007, made about 8 posts, then 3 posts in 2008 and one post in 2009. If anything, starting over this blog is a promise to myself to keep consistent with something for at LEAST the remainder of the year. Whether it's just sharing one word, a picture or spilling my guts on something that I feel passionately about, I want to try and do it.

Earlier I tried to vlog, and it was sort of awkward, but I'll keep at that too. When I do v/blog I'll post it here.

I think I've started this at a weird part where I'm trying to finish high school, I'm frustrated with myself, but I need a plug since sometimes my shrink may not be enough. I have college come september, but I need to get my english and an extra credit--since the guidance counsellors didn't tell me I'd be a credit short and unable to graduate until this week. Because of that, I can't be in a summer production of Les Miserables, and that hurts a lot. Summer school is going to be a pain, with either working all summer or for a few weeks over the summer with random breaks in between.

Until then, I have a recital to worry about on Friday. I'm just tired thinking about it.